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Volume XVII Business Arts Sports Weather
Interviews Op-Eds Horoscopes Staff 		Sunday, 16th October, 2005
The World is Crazy
Look, it's a cute little side column. Isn't it purty. One little news story thingie can go here. Plus a small picture if someone feels like hunting one down. Just don't get me sued for copyright infringement, mmkay?

And I'm not kidding about that.

The Management


Read All About It
BAGHDAD, Iraq - Parliament on Wednesday approved a set of last-minute amendments to Iraq's draft constitution, sealing a compromise aimed at gaining Sunni support in this weekend's crucial referendum, the parliament speaker said.

And other stuff like this. You get the idea. We can splash real news in with in-game news, depending what we can get. And there's always room for pretty pictures. Mm, pictures. Here's one in the meantime:


Ganked from CNN
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan (CNN) -- Pakistan's nuclear rival India has become the latest nation to deliver aid to survivors of the deadliest quake in South Asia for a century, as health experts warn the Himalayan region could become a fertile breeding ground for disease.

The Indian plane landed at Islamabad airport just before noon Wednesday carrying tents, medicines and other relief goods, Pakistani authorities said.

After initial reluctance, Pakistan decided to accept aid from India, with whom it has fought three wars -- two of them over the disputed Kashmir region that took the brunt of Saturday's earthquake. (Working together)

Meanwhile, U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice arrived in Pakistan after saying Washington would likely add to the $50 million it has committed to the quake recovery effort.

Don't sue me


Ganked from the BBC
London: The Greatest City on Earth? BBC London is hosting an evening of lively debate which asks the question: Does London rightly regards itself as the centre of the universe?

We want you to join us for a lively discussion that asks whether London rightly regards itself as the centre of the universe.

What do you love about London? What winds you up? How does London compare to other world cities?

Would you leave the big smoke if you could? And is London only really a place for the affluent?

The event at the Museum of London on Thursday October 13 will be recorded for BBC London 94.9.

All in all it promises to be a real treat.

This ain't your momma's paper
Bush To Appoint Someone To Be In Charge Of Country

WASHINGTON, DC (The Onion)—In response to increasing criticism of his handling of the war in Iraq and the disaster in the Gulf Coast, as well as other issues, such as Social Security reform, the national deficit, and rising gas prices, President Bush is expected to appoint someone to run the U.S. as soon as Friday.

Bush presents his shortlist for the Secretary of the Nation post.

"During these tumultuous times, America is in need of a bold, resolute person who can get the job done," said Bush during a press conference Monday. "My fellow Americans, I assure you that I will appoint just such a person with all due haste."

The Cabinet-level position, to be known as Secretary of the Nation, was established by an executive order Sept. 2, but has remained unfilled in the intervening weeks.

"I've been talking to folks from all across this country, from Louisiana to Los Angeles, and people tell me the same thing: This nation needs a strong, compassionate leader," Bush said. "In response to these concerns, I'm making this a top priority. I will name a good, qualified person as soon as possible."

Among the new secretary's duties are preserving, protecting, and defending the Constitution of the United States, commanding the U.S. armed forces, appointing judges and ambassadors, and vetoing congressional legislation. The secretary will also be tasked with overseeing all foreign and domestic affairs, including those relating to the economy, natural disasters, national infrastructure, homeland security, poverty, and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

The secretary will report directly to the president.

For weeks, members of both political parties have been urging Bush to fill the post.

"Every day the president waits is another day he's accountable for needless deaths at home and abroad, the stagnating economy, and the threat of terrorism," Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) said. "This post is far too vital to be left vacant. Mr. President, there is no reason to delay."

"I applaud the president's decision to find a strong leader for our country, but it's imperative that he make his selection soon," said Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV), adding that he and all Democrats hope to work closely with the new national executive.


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